Saturday, March 19, 2011

How To Sleep With A Cop

So how many badge bunnies will now be drawn to my site when they type that into the google search engine?

So here's the routine. For the future cop wives or the cadet wives this is what I have learned about sleeping with a cop (and I do mean the literal form of the word sleeping, all you dirty minds out there).

This scenario applies 100% of the time when the cop is on graves and about 80% when they are working swings.

So the work week is through. Your cop finally has some time off. And for you, after some sleepless nights of worrying about him or sleepless nights because its just not the same having your bed empty you are looking forward to some synchronized rest next to your main man.

You have dinner together, give your cop the run down on all the happenings that he missed during his long shifts.  He fills you in on his week and you watch a little TV together.  For us, its Survivor. I don't watch it until his day off. 

You both climb into bed, turn down the lights perhaps the TV glows with the sound down low. You toss, he turns. You doze, he doesn't. You wake to the sound of sirens, its just the new episode of The First 48, the volume not so low anymore.  You look at the clock, its midnight.  You turn, he tosses. You doze.  You wake, he's eating a bowl of cereal, afterall its lunch time for him.  You look at the clock, its 1:30am. You roll over, You doze. You wake, your bed is empty.  You catch a glimpse of him as he leaves the room.  You look at the clock, its 3:00am. You doze. You toss and turn in your empty bed as the sun begins to break through the corners of your darkening shades.

Without fail, this how I sleep with my cop.  And yet I still feel disappointed when I wake only to watch him leave the room in the wee hours of the morning.  I don't know why.  I can't imagine being in his shoes and switching my sleeping schedule every few days.

So, to my cop I say this, I look forward to "sleeping" with you honey, even if it doesn't last all night.


  1. On my first day off, I go to sleep at the same time as my wife, usually around midnight. I am tired and need the extra sleep.

    On my second day off, I tuck her in and then stay up an hour or so longer.

    On my third day off (4-10's), I go to bed around 0230 hours, so I am not exhausted on my Monday.

    When my wife gets up, she turns on the fan, so I have white noise to help me sleep.

  2. RD- You two have a nice routine worked out. CA Cop and I are getting there, but were are not quite as "well oiled" yet. Finding the perfect rythmn takes some time, and with each shift change we have to relearn how we had it worked out the last time.

  3. It takes time. My wife and I have had 15 years.

    When I was a pup, she worked at the precinct as a desk clerk. We had the same days off.

    When we had children, she resigned. I took the late night feedings, so she could sleep.

    Now, that are children are in school, the routine is easier.

    I am very glad I don't have rotating shifts, I don't know how those officers do it.

  4. My husband sticks with the hours even on his days off (for nights, for evenings he'll push his sleep closer to mine). So he'll lay down with me while I fall asleep and then move to the living room either when I fall asleep or when I tell him he's being too twitchy. He'll come to bed earlier on his days off, usually just before I get up so sometimes I can stay with him while he falls asleep. He has a hard time sleeping to begin with and we don't want to mess with it and push him towards insomnia. He rotates shifts every 3 months, so we do get to sleep together when he is on days.
    I like the rotating, as he doesn't get bored (we live in a quiet small town) and we get to spend different times together. Might have a different perspective when we have kids.

  5. CA Cop chooses to switch his sleeping back and forth on his days off because he would never see the kids if he didn't. I seriously don't know how he does it!