Monday, December 5, 2011

Thirsty Anyone?

CA Cop could tell they were trying to avoid him. The late model Chrysler with the spinning rims made a few quick turns and caught the officer's darting eyes. The three male occupants were in their mid 20's- CA Cop correctly estimated as he called in the stop to dispatch. The driver of the teal green vehicle hesitated only briefly after his eyes met the flashing red and blue reflection in his rear view mirror. He pulled the pimped out ride to the curb of a main Baytown thoroughfare. CA Cop cautiously approached the vehicle.  Robotically, he pressed his fingers on the rear of the car.  The smell of skunk slapped him in the face and made the cop smile just enough to reveal that enchanting twinkle in his eyes.  He now had cause to search the group of hardcore players.  As he and his partners pulled each adult out of their sweet ride the cop couldn't help but noticed that brand names checkered their clothing.  A swag group, no doubt.  As CA Cop searched one of the males he felt a large bottle in the man's front pocket.  He lifted up the clear plastic bottle and discovered that his hand now held a container which was filled with an amber-yellow liquid.  A hand warmer was securely taped to the outside of the bottle keeping its contents at, shall we say, "body temperature" warmth.

Yes folks. our thugged out, clean fitted gentleman was carrying a bottle of urine in his designer jeans.

CA Cop stared in disbelief. 

Well at least that's what I would do.  At this point, I don't know if things like this still shock him.

CA Cop stared in disgust, "What the hell are you doing with your life, brother? Your are 25 years old and driving around with a bottle full of piss in your pocket just so you can get high? And not fail your drug test? You are a loser. Only a complete loser would have someone else's piss in their pocket."

Hey honey, at least he showed some ingenuity with the hand warmer and scotch tape.  Points for that, right?

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